Pouch Test - Day 5 and a meltdown

Ok..the meltdown did NOT result in eating stuff I shouldn't have.  Well, not immediately.

Friday came home (late I might add, after yet ANOTHER trauma alert and needing to stay past when I normally do and then running to the store and stuff...) had my sf ice cream and what not...talked to Brian for awhile as with my gym days the past few days we haven't seen each other much...went to bed.

Woke up all fine and dandy.  Back story - got my "friend" two days ago..so was sooooo excited because *generally* speaking 2 days after I start is when my water weight comes off.  So I figured, what the heck.  I've done the 5DPT, my water weight is coming off, I've gone to the gym very dilligently...it's been 5 days since I've weighed myself...let's get on the scale.

Wrong EFFING move.  Saw a gain of 5 pounds.  Yup, GAINED 5 pounds.  Since starting the 5DPT.  Now..it's *possible* I actually gained more but didn't know and am now losing it due to water weight (I did not weigh myself in the "middle" of the pouch test just for this reason)  In fact, I probably did, because I gain 7-10 pounds each cycle.  So probably around Tuesday - Thursday I gained that and lost it already...but I can't say for sure.  And I freaked.  I mean, totally freaked.  I was crying hysterically, saying stupid things...driving Brian crazy.  And, probably, my dear friend Eric who I texted in a complete tizzy.

Unfortunately, Brian just CAN'T understand...he tries, he really tries...but he doesn't get it.  A) He's never been morbidly obese B) He's not female.  His response "Just suck it up, you'll get there"  Nope, wrong answer buddy.  Eric...he obviously gets the emotional frustration the previously MO feelings and the struggle feelings...and did his damned best to try to talk me down, and make me see the logic of some things.  Made me feel MUCH better...but I was still pretty down about everything.  AND of course...my first thought was "well eat whatever you want, it obviously doesn't matter"  Eric talked me outta that one real quick.  So I grabbed my shake and left for work insanely early...because everything was ******g me off and I just wanted some alone time with my music blaring.

I've stuck to most of my food.  I did have a moment and had graham crackers...my "work" comfort food.  And ya know what?  They didn't taste good.  In fact...I threw 1/2 of them away.  AND, they didn't make me feel better.   AND...they didn't make those 5 pounds come off.  Huh.  food didn't solve the issue.  Amazing, no?

I'm better this morning than I was 12 hours ago.  Still need to work on some things...but I'll get there.

Thanks for listening!

Oh Pam, how I understand.

And truthfully, the 5DPT never helped me lose any weight. Maybe a pound or so. The first time, I bawled about it. Now I have to remember that through my own experience, doing the pouch test is a way to eliminate carbs and get back to basics. Which after a few weeks of being on track.......weight comes off.

I am always amazed at people who lose several pounds doing it because it never works like that for me. I chalk it up to me just being a "water retainer" in general, no matter what time of the month.

Regardless of any weight lost through the test, look for changes afterwards as you focus on the right foods and kick carbs and graham crakers out the door.

Hang in there sweetie.............

aww hun, hang in there! You know I am always here if you need something too. Those PMS pounds SUCK! I gain 7-10 too during my cycle. Maybe the heat has been causing you to retain water too?

You are going to come out of this on top no matter what! You are breaking the "carb cycle"

I'm so proud of you for sticking to the 5DPT!!!  And I'm glad Eric was able to pick up the pieces and put them back together again for you!!!  Paul is like Brian---he's supportive, but he just doesn't get it because he's never lived it.  You're doing a great job, Pam---stick with it!!

Pam, I hope to have the strength and conviction that you do when several years out.  I have to admit, I don't know how the whole pouch test works, but it sounds like the advice above is sound - recalibrate, adjust thinking and get back on track.  We are all proud of your diligence in doing this!

Keep on it!
Don't give up, we have all been through the "why bother" - I would get dressed every morning and look in the mirror trying to adjust an outfit to cover some sin and say "oh well, this is as good as it gets, I'm fat and can't hide it" - don't fall in to that trap.  It is your head giving you an excuse to eat.. the truth is it does matter - every bite does. 

Look in the mirror and see the beautiful woman that you are, the accomplishments that you have achieved and give the graham cracker the finger.

Pam,

Just think about this. You went to your comfort food and it didn't help. That is a GOOD thing!! I had a similar experience where I was stressed out and instead of eating, I actually stopped eating because it just was not appealing to me. Yes, they didn't help you lose those five pounds. I usually weigh myself AFTER my period is done! I noticed that when I have my time I go to the bathroom ALOT more. I guess that is the water weight going away. I don't go anywhere near my scale during my time because I know that I will be disappointed!

Keep your chin up! You can do it!!

Beth

OMG that is horrible Pam. I'm so sorry.  Maybe its muscle.  I know that can happen.  Also when you jump on in a couple days i bet that will be down.  I know it is so frustrating to keep doing all the right things and then that ******* (excuse my English) scale does something so horrid.

I think you kow what caused it and you did everything right so do not beat yourself up.. and don't read the post I just put up!!!

Awesome Work Pam!!!   It's testing your mettle now girlfriend.   Don't let it get you.   You are tenacious !   You are persistent!   YOU WANT THIS!   You know you have your "friend" (how the hell did it EVER get that name I want to know)....You know you started exercising hard this week which means your muscles are injured and holding water.  You know your hormones are ALLLLLL over the place with your food changes and exercise changes and when tha****er flushes out so will the toxins that are making you emotional and THEN the scale will show it.   STUBBORNESS and TENACITY is the key.   Get MAD, Get FIRED UP!!!   

Awesome response jackie, awesome!

Don't let that get you down.  You are Pam the exercising machine.  You are building muscle and sticking to the basics.  You WILL succeed!
-Sara


read the fine print "Pam will do it!"